Wednesday, January 04, 2006

8 hours.....

SO I just came back from a walk with Mom.... Wow, what aboring walk!!!! I really dont think she wants to hear anything I have to say.... Anytime I started a new subject and started to talk about it, shed call for the dog, or change the subject.... Every single time!!!! and she spoke for most of it. So anyway I just listened, let her talk. If shes "soooooo concerned about me" you'd think shed listen to me? Or is it rong to assume that? Anyway, My parents will never know or understand me, no matter how hard they "try". Fuck, it could take me maybe half an hour to an hour max to fill my mom in about my life.... To make her understand why I never spoke to her and my dad for most of high school, or why I moved out of their house the day after graduation, or why I wore that god damn wrist band all the time... Fuck how can they be soo god damn stupid!?!?!?! And yes im using stupid because they knew something was going on..... They knew.

Ohh fuck offf... man, I hate getting into these moods but they are soo hard to steer cleer from!!! Fuck, like I wouldnt think soo negatively if I wastn constantly reminded of it.... I was soo sad when I woke up this morning cuz I realised it was my last day here, so I went on MSN and changed my name to "leaveing 2night" and just stuff like that.... And like 2 ppl have talked to me all fucking day... So you know what? Fuck them... fuck them all, who the fuck cares.... There wasnt many ppl there for me back in high schoool, and theres none now... the only ppl I can rely on is my brother Dave... Fuck I want to stay out in Edmonton now. Fuck coming back to PEI.. what the fuck for? Oviously theres no difference in being here or not, so why not? Ahh fuck it, I could just be full of shit and the 20 some ppl I sent taht e-mail to could have been really busy and just didnt have time to call me. Or maybe they didnt want to spend those 40 cents a minute for like 2mins while they talk to me.... Or maybe.... Just maybe they dont want to talk to me.... lol, maybe... Fuck maybe, I already know of a couple ppl who've done that.... Ahh well, I guess you live and you learn eh? Well I dont want to learn anymore.... whats that tell you bout the living part.... Fuck it all, Thats right, I said it again, FUCK LIFE... Who gives a shit... Now mom;, when you read this, dont bother calling me, because if I pick up the phone and you say anything related to this blog, i'll hang up right away. Because I know you wouldnt of had any idea of anything that I said in this blog, if I didnt write it in the blog... You'd Never Ever know!!!!! NO IDEA!!!!! Anyway, Tony's home now so Im going to go do something, anything to get my head out of these clouds.... L8a days


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